How far can you get with a title and a meme? Let’s find out.

Waiting service in general make me uncomfortable, there is a certain level of serfdom that I just don’t like. I’m that prat that tides up everyone’s empty plates and cutlery into a pile at the end of a meal. I’m the bloke that takes back all glasses at the end of a pub stay.

There is also a Luddite strain to my character in that I won’t have unnecessary apps on my phone. Can only order drinks through your pub app? Then I’m off.

If we put an arbitrary date of say 2012 when beer had its revival then I did the majority of my travelling abroad well before that date. Subsequently, the choice of beers in any pub/bar in cities across the likes of Germany, Spain, France, Finland, Ukraine, Poland, USA Ireland, etc. did not merit any great choice or need to view any kind of menu. Granted that last two nations mentioned generally dealt in bar service anyway but the other it was mainly light or dark? 300mL or 500mL?

In the UK I’m now expected to wait as some poor helpless soul tries to remember just what it available on the bar. This is generally aided by “anything but Amstel” in most gaffs but those with many wickets are a chore.

The usual helpfully written blackboard is fine, if you’re able to sit at a table in view of it.

And god damn your hard thought out pump clip art, god damn it to unobservable oblivion.

I’ll trollulate that those who welcome table service and wish to see it stay will clamour for the perceived European cafe culture way of life, a bit of civility, maybe a spot of gentrification, deter the Hoi polloi perhaps.

Pah, typical English drinking culture.

They’ll be some happy mix in some places that have the planning, management, training and budgetary nous to carry it off.

I’ll still ignore it all and walk to the bar; happy to queue 3 deep, be generally ignored because of my small stature and lack of assertiveness, curse the taster twats, thank someone for pointing out I’m actually next or that the bar staff have the required training to recognise the order at which the punters arrived and then struggle backwards and forwards with a mixture of 8 various beverages.

Because I like the autonomy.


Here is a completely unrelated meme about nothing in particular.

One thought on “Tablerrruuughhh

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